The Light Fantastic
by Jessa L'Rynn
Summary: She is always with you and this is where you have always belonged and this is how you survived the war. This is how you survived all wars, how you came to this place, how you will come to every place you ever are.


**The Light Fantastic**

The TARDIS materializes and you stare in horror; everything is wrong, everything, and you know you're about to die in vain, after all. Again. You couldn't save them, couldn't save anyone, you never could, you never will. The possibilities have gone cold around you and you're as barren and in the dark as any human child.

The doors are blasted open by a light brighter than suns, than entire stellar systems, and the most powerful being in the multi-verse is there, driving you, the last Lord of Time, to your knees. Her eyes are burning and her soul, and you know her, oh, you know her, but it is an impossibility beyond even your understanding of the word.

She is there, a goddess in her own right, a being both omnipotent and omniscient, a being whose will is reality. And she sees _every_thing, in ways you know are familiar to only you, and in ways even you cannot imagine. She _is_ everything, this glowing creature of immeasurable power who has made herself from the last thing you would have ever imagined could create this sort of divinity.

Somehow, you wonder why you didn't see it coming. She is human and all she has ever done has been done in the name of love. She calls you hers and oh you are, but you were and have been and will be and can't imagine that there was ever anything different.

You think maybe you didn't see it because you forgot that you could be loved, just like you forgot about her. But she was there before, the light fantastic surrounding you, enfolding you, filling you, loving you. She is what made you live before and here she is again. The Time War is ending again and this time it is your turn.

You step forward and you kiss her, and she fills you, mind, body, and soul. Every orifice of your body and every particle of your being and every receptor in your triple-stranded DNA, every piece of you from beginning to end is filled with her. She moves through time at will and at whim, keeping you suspended in that moment, taking pleasure in filling you up, in being filled by you, giving pleasure and peace in return.

It will be the death of you, this experience that is so much more than a kiss, but she saved you before and always and you must save her now. She is at her beginning, here at your end, the shining one who has always been back there, just out of sight.

You give yourself to her only to find that she has given herself to you and to everything you are and ever will be. It horrifies and terrifies you to see it, that there is a 'will be' still attached to 'you'.

But she is comfort and solace and promise and hope. She burns around you and through you. All any world could see is two lovers finally touching, finally meeting, but she is taking you, taking you, taking you. Everything you are is hers, oh gods, and everything you ever will be is hers again and again and always.

She fills you up with light and water, remakes you whole from sterile ashes, and you are equal and opposite in moments, filling her as she is filling you.

Slowly, ever so slowly, you begin to understand. She is always with you and this is where you have always belonged and this is how you survived the war. This is how you survived all wars, how you came to this place, how you will come to every place you ever are.

This woman, this goddess, this light and magic chaos creature, friend and companion to the time that spawned you, she loves you and has always loved you and you are hers and...

And she is yours.

The whole of reality detonates around you and through you, pain and joy and love like the diamond shards of exploding eternities lancing through you. Pleasure that is erotic and ascetic at once burns through you, all physical, all mental, all emotional, all at once. Everything that you are is alive with ecstasy and for the briefest sliver of time, you and she are fully, wholly one, in ways no other beings have ever been or ever will be. You are with and in and through and as, all at once, and you never want it to end, not ever.

When common day reasserts itself, when reality resets, you breathe again and live again, and your goddess is mortal and your mortal is collapsing in your arms. You will never truly forget and never truly remember either and the blinding light that saved your life is about to end it for a time, but only you can save your love, now with words as then with actions.

You walk away from your last battlefield, no where near so alone as you believed you would be, no where near so dead, either. Time is counting you down in paired heartbeats but it will give you this, or at least try to do. So you wait for the end and the woman who created herself the wolf, just for you and everything you are and everything you will ever become.


End file.
